Growing up in New Canaan, CT, we were middle class.
It was a time when we wore tube socks and velour sweatpants.
My parents were divorced.
My mom had a house and my dad had a house a mile up the road.
My mom didn’t fit in.
We didn’t fit in.
I got bullied by a girl who called me a rich girl because I had two houses.
Then my mom decided to move us to L.A.
Moving to L.A. was strange and bizarre.
My single mom didn’t have money when compared to others.
We were Beverly Hills Billies
Living an apartment so I could go to Beverly Hills High School.
I had a nice allowance from my dad.
When money is tight, folks, even kids, develop self-discipline.
I didn’t dress very well because
I rather have had money to go out to lunch with my friends than to spend it on clothes.
I didn’t think much about my clothes until I was dating a son of a very rich business owner.
So my mom took me shopping at Guess, the store, on Little Santa Monica Blvd.
She picked out 2 or 3 suits. It was the Madonna style at the time - suit jackets were hot.
She called my dad and demanded he pay for the suits.
He did and bought me 2 of them.
I loved those suits - one in green and one in black.
My dad was very generous.
But instead, today, what happens is the opposite.
A dad remarries.
The 2nd wife doesn’t want her husband to spend money on his kids from the 1st marriage.
So the 1st wife (ex-wife) feels obligated to pay for:
expensive vacations,
rent for their kids’ appt at college
even if it means she takes a hit.
This makes me frustrated.
The mom can’t afford to be spending a lot of money, especially on fancy vacations
I’m not sure the kids will understand how this impacts their mom’s finances.
One of the most basic lessons they teach in financial literacy classes is wants vs needs.
I had a good sense of our finances.
I was the one who balanced my mom’s checkbook!
But other kids do not, unless you talk to them about the sacrifices you are making for them.
Money is all about trade-offs and choices.
If you have to make a tough financial decision, share your rationale with your kids.
An honest conversation about money with your kids will help them better manage their own money. This will pay huge dividends to you in the future.
Thanks for reading!
Your Friendly Wealth Engagement Guide,
Tiffany Kent, Tiffany@wealthengagement.com
Empowering women to take control of their future!
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